My Spare Keys

1433267487I don’t know whether I merely misplaced the spare set of camper keys or lost them entirely.

Now let’s be clear, there is a huge difference between misplacing something and losing it.

When you misplace something, you don’t know where you put it. When you lose something, your spouse doesn’t know where you put it.

So I had to ask.

“Do you know where I put my spare keys to the RV?”

“Why would I know that?”

“Because if I merely misplaced them, you would know where they are.”

“You lost the keys, didn’t you?”


“Then you better have another set made.”

So I did or at least I tried to. While at The Big Box Store, I visited the key kiosk.

“We can duplicate all your keys,” the key guy said, “except this one.”

Our RV requires an astonishing number of keys. There are two locks for the tow hitch. One to ensure that no one steals whatever it is you are towing and the other to make sure no one steals the hitch itself.

There are two keys to the door. One to turn the upper lock and the other for the lower lock.

Why the door requires two locks, I do not know.

There is an ignition key and a companion to open the engine compartment. Again, why is a mystery.

There is a key to open the panel for the outside TV and please don’t ask me why we have an outside TV. It was not our decision.

And then there is a single key that allows access all the outside storage compartments, which also operates the lower door lock.

Ironically, this vital key is the one The Big Box Store could not be reproduce.

So I went to a place called The Key Place.

“Can you copy this key?” I asked.

“Not that one,” the lady said.

“Why not?”

She just shrugged.

“Is it a special non-reproducible key?”

“Nope,” she said.

“Then what is it?”

She shrugged again. “It is just annoying and difficult.”

At that point, I did not know if she was talking about the key or me, but I had to ask, “Is there any hope?”

“Sure,” she said.

I perked up.

“You might have merely misplaced it.”

So after trying a couple of other Big Box Stores, two locksmiths and a guy from the Old Neighborhood who is extremely adept at replicating both keys and credit cards, I finally did what I should have done all along and visited to my local ACE Hardware store.

“Can you replicate this key?” I asked.

“Nope,” the key guy said.

I turned to go.

“But Roy can.”


“Yeah, though he won’t be in until Friday.”

I returned on Friday and sure enough, Roy did it.

Elated, I rushed home and tested every key. They worked perfectly which meant I had a functional spare set.

“Here is a spare key set,” I told my wife, “if you give me your keys, I will put them on your chain. That way you will always know where the spare keys are.”

She handed me her keys, and there dangling from her key-chain was the complete set of spare RV keys that I had been looking for all along.

“What the…?”


“I asked if you knew where the spare keys were.”

“No you didn’t.”

“Yes, I did.”

“You asked if I knew where YOUR spare keys were.”

So I guess I was wrong. There is misplacing things, there is losing things and then there is something else entirely.

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